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In fact, I was convinced that - having made what seemed at the time as a very certain leap into lesbianism - I would never again have cause to go out with a man.Of course, that's not how I saw my life panning out when I was a child.

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He was my first love and we had a passionate physical relationship.For some, this fact was more shocking than the betrayal of Huhne's wife, which is a familiar enough yarn in the world of politics.Of course, I can't speak for another woman, but I do arrive at this story with baggage - of a very personal nature.I am convinced that while men are usually entirely driven by sex when it comes to choosing a mate, women are often attracted more by the emotional side of the relationship and I was excited by the close bond a relationship with another female could bring.I realise that many gay people will think it sounds absurd that I 'chose' lesbianism.Perhaps the best analogy is that I had come to see men in terms of 'black and white' whereas I saw women in colour. I didn't tell him the truth at first but when I finally admitted that I had fallen for another woman, he was relieved. My close friends knew immediately - but I shied away from telling my family for several years.

I knew that, as Irish Catholics with a strong sense of family, they would be shocked and upset.

I fell in love at 17 with Tim, a hugely attractive pupil at the local grammar school.

It was a very intense relationship and I believed I would be with him for ever.

But as I reached 22 I realised that the people I liked best were all women and in truth always had been, if only on a friendship basis.

I had studied feminist literature at university and it opened my eyes to the possibility of sexuality as a life choice.

For them, their sexuality is so innate and undeniable that the issue of 'choice' doesn't come into it. For I can honestly say that I never felt the need to 'come out' as gay or straight - I simply decided to fall in love with women.